Lessons in
by AGoodOmen
Summary: Some of the things Emily's new family teaches her at the start of her time in the 21st century. All characters, post S5 (No Future!Matt) Pairings Jecker, Conby and of course Memily. Just a series of fluffy little oneshots.
1. Hand to Hand

**A series of oneshots detailing some of Emily's 'lessons' in the first few months of her life in the 21st century, each one from a different team member. A showcase of their friendships/relationships. Post S5 Finale. Pairings: Conby/Memily/Jecker.**

**I own nothing, except the arrangement of small black marks on your screen, about 400 books, some clothes, a small rabbit...you get the idea.**

** Enjoy.**

**Hand to Hand**

Abby's foot kicked out, catching Emily off guard and the girls tumbled to the ground. "That's another thing to watch out for." Said the blonde grinning. Her pupil was learning fast. The other woman sat up laughing, catching her breath. "One day I'll beat you."

"Nah, the only person who can take me in a fight is Becker, and that's only when I'm fighting fair."

"And when you fight unfairly?" Asked Emily quirking an eyebrow at her friend.

"Ah, well, then he usually ends up a quivering heap on the floor." Said Abby with a wicked grin.

"You'll have to teach me how to block that. I don't particularly want to quiver."

"Oh don't worry, the move that beats action man only works on blokes." The Victorian woman raised an eyebrow. Abby laughed and pulled Emily up off the mat. "Welcome to Abby Maitland's school of self-defence, the ways of the ancient masters." When her friend looked confused she sighed and muttered something about spending too much time with Connor. She then proceeded to enlighten her pupil in the area of moves that will beat Becker, or any bloke really. When Matt and Connor found the girls they were collapsed on the mat in a sweaty heap, laughing hysterically. On perceiving Connor's slightly too pleased expression Abby hoisted herself up and turned to her friend:

"Would you like a proper demonstration?"

"Yes please." Said Emily, grinning in a thoroughly modern way.

**You know what to do. Thanks to all the people who've reviewed my stuff so far. This fic will be in chapters,so follow/fav it so you don't miss any.**


	2. ICT

**Information Communication Technology**

Connor spun around his lab like and out of control spinning top, waving his hands in the air and emitting a slightly annoying hum. He spotted a stool and pounced on it, sliding it towards a bench and seating his new pupil on it. He looked at Emily beseechingly, and she smiled encouragingly at him. "So," he started, slightly awkwardly, because Emily intimidated him a bit. "What do you want to know?"

"Umm, everything I think."

"That might take a while."

"Enough to be useful, at least. I hate not being able to do things. And Matt said to tell you that not everybody speaks computer."

"Got it. Well, ok, let's start with turning it on. You do this." He pressed the big button on the laptop with a flourish. She looked at him. He grinned back at her and, like everyone, Emily was unable to resist his smile. She smiled too, but gently prompted "what then?" Everything went fine, (he only slipped into advanced geek twice) until they got to the internet. And Connor realised he'd forgotten to set any filters on his search engine. "I'll just get you one of those computer courses yeah?" He called after the fleeing woman with a very red face.

**See the little box and the blue button? See it? :)**


	3. Therapy

**(I am not promoting the shops/sites mentioned in this fic, they just seemed lie the kind of places Jess would recommend to Emily, based on Jess' persona, and Emily's outfits.)**

**Therapy **

"Don't worry Emily. There are nice things on the internet."

"Like what?" The Victorian woman still looked slightly shaken, even after a down to earth conversation with the bubbly but surprisingly worldly FC.

"Shopping!" Cried Jess enthusiastically. Her friend smiled, at least some things never changed. She'd enjoyed shopping in the 1800s, it was one of her few pleasures. Her family had been rich and Henry had never scrimped on anything that would enhance his image, and a fashionable wife certainly did that. A thought struck her and she frowned.

"But how can one buy something without being in a shop?"

"Did Lester set you up with a bank account?"

"Yes, and Matt made a, um, savings account too."

"So you have a card?"

"This thing?" She pulled the rectangle of plastic from her pocket, the rectangle that could make the funny paper money come out of the walls.

"That's it. Right." Said the heeled brunette seriously, "Let's go shopping."

They had tabs open on Musto, Aspinal, Barbour, Coggles and Net-A-Porter and Jess had just opened up Harvey Nicholls when Matt and Becker popped up behind them.

"What are you trying to do Jessica, bankrupt her?"

"Hush Becker. Clothes are important."

"Very." Added Emily, and the two girls exchanged smiles.

"No, but seriously," the soldier continued "what about rent, and food and…"

"She doesn't need to pay rent, she lives with me." Matt pointed out absently "And you know we never eat on this job. Anyway it's not that much. Even putting half her money into savings she'll still have masses left this month. You go right ahead Emily." He wandered over to the coffee machine.

"Listen to the man Becker," said his girlfriend cheekily, "The woman needs clothes, and so do I."

"Jess you bought six pairs of shoes at the weekend."

"And?" Becker shook his head wordlessly, and opened his mouth to reply when a cup of coffee was thrust into his hands and his team leader towed him away by the elbow.

"Seriously mate, if you want to stay in a relationship - shut up now."

"Why the coffee?"

"It's Irish coffee. You're in a relationship with a shopaholic."

"So are you." His friend simply upended his hip flask into his cup.

**Aaannnd - Hit that button. (It is perfectly possible to buy six pairs of shoes in one go, especially if you earn as much as Jess. She's not shallow, she's discerning.)**


	4. The Horseless Carriage

**The Horseless Carriage**

"Put your foot on the other pedal and press down. Good. Now pull up the handbrake and turn off the ignition. Now breathe." Emily huffed at the sardonic grin the Captain was sporting, but allowed herself to relax gratefully.

"You and the others make it look so easy. It's terrifying."

"You're doing well, you just need to relax your death grip on the steering wheel and try going at more than twenty miles an hour."

_"Leave her alone Becker, imagine if all you'd ever ridden in was a carriage."_

"Jessica, why are you hijacking my lesson?"

_"It's not my fault you've still got comms in. Don't let me distract you."_ Emily grinned at Becker's look of mingled affection and mild annoyance, and started to undo her seatbelt.

"Oh no," the soldier said with a slightly evil smile, "we've got to drive back now." When she sighed and tensed up he looked at her. "Come on, you've fought creatures, been buried alive and moved in with Matt. How scary can it be?"

"It's not like riding."

"Now that's scary." Becker muttered.

"You find that scary?"

"I'm a trained soldier Emily, I don't find anything scary." He said quickly.

"Alright, I've a proposition for you. You teach me how to drive and I'll do my best not to be terrified." He looked pleased but dubious. "And I will teach you to ride and you will do your best not to be terrified." She smirked at his less than pleased expression. "Or I shall inform Matt that you included living with him in a list of terrifying undertakings."

"You have been spending far too much time with him. Fine. It's a deal. Now shut up and drive."

_"Hilary Becker!"_

"Je-ss!"

**Thanks so much to everyone who's reviewed so far. Keep it up folks!**


	5. History in the Future-Perfect

**History in the Future Perfect**

Lester quite enjoyed history at school. He had of course studied PPE at Oxford, but he had taken History A-Level and if he remembered correctly he'd got an A. He'd enjoyed pointing out the failings of the leaders they studied, especially the French. So when his newest employee (or maverick freelancer as he referred to them at his club) asked him to tell her about what had happened in the world since 1876 he had welcomed the diversion (albeit sarcastically) from his mountains of paperwork and crushingly dull civil service meetings.

"I hope you understand Lady Merchant, that though the events I will speak of will be in the future tense on what Temple calls your personal timeline, they are in the past tense now, though they are also in the past tense on your, what was it again… interactive timeline."

She looked blank and he regretted ever asking Connor to help with his tenses.

"Let's just start with the death of Queen Victoria shall we? I can't be expected to explain advanced quantum physics that I'm almost certain Temple makes up as he goes along"

Sometime later Abby and Jess were walking past Lester's office giggling over plans for the former's hen night when the door opened and an irate Emily stormed out.

"He's making it up! No-one could be that stupid. It's inconceivable." She walked off leaving the stunned girls to peer in at the slightly shell-shocked civil servant.

"I'd just got to Reagan. She refused to believe that the American people elected an actor. Especially when I explained the concept of a B-Movie."

"Wait till you get to Sarah Palin, or Bush." Said Abby smirking.

"Wait till I get to the coalition," Lester countered "She'll want to catch the first anomaly home…I don't blame her." He added as the phone rang.

**Just one more to go chaps! BTW, PPE stands for Politics Philosophy and Economics, and it's the course to do if you want to be anything in politics. (Disclaimer: There are other universities [But few that do PPE])**


	6. Courdon Bleu

**So, last in series chaps! Thanks for sticking with it, I hope it has lived up to your expectations/standards. (Oh and I'm in no way endorsing featured supermarket, there are may other places to buy comestibles.)**

**Courdon Bleu**

"What are we making?" Emily asked Matt as they trailed round brightly coloured aisles on a rare trip to the supermarket. Emily had become used to the colours and strange foods and the oddness of having everything under one roof, but she still stayed close to him as they walked round Waitrose on a rare anomaly free afternoon. "I thought we'd try shepherd's pie." Said Matt, dropping a tray of lamb mince into the basket. "Oh? What is it?" asked Emily curiously. "Basically meat and potatoes." He said with a small smile. "Nothin' fancy."

"Well, hopefully I won't be able to ruin meat and potatoes." She said with a small sigh. Of all the skills the 21st century demanded, cooking was her downfall. Luckily she was in a job where food tended to be grabbed between anomalies from the nearest takeaway or café, but she had wanted to learn in-case she ever had occasion to stand still.

"Hey, you haven't ruined anythin' yet."

"That's because you have a cast iron stomach. I can't believe you actually ate that pasta."

"It was good!"

"Matt."

"Ok it was a bit overdone. But it wasn't ruined Emily."

"It…Oh, never mind, what else do we need?"

A little later…

"Matt even you can't eat that. It bounces!"

"I…no, you're right I can't." Matt bounced a bit of mash experimentally. "The meat's good though Emily, it's cooked and everythin'."

"Yes, it's just a pity I used sugar instead of salt." She replied, sliding down the cooker to slump morosely on the floor.

"Hey, that was my fault. I should have marked my jars. Look, you've only made three things and none of them have been a complete disaster."

"What's your definition of a complete disaster?"

"The end of the world." He said with a crooked grin, sliding onto her floor next to her.

**It's over! (or is it?) As always, thanks and virtual hugs to those who have reviewed and thanks to everyone for reading, reviewer or not. :) Oh, and the bouncing mash from the top of the pie? That actually happened to my pater once. And it honestly did bounce.**


	7. Love

**Surprise! One last lesson. (I would say I'd been planning to hold this back and release it at some time with special significance but that would be a lie. I just forgot it. Sorry!) :D**

**Love**

Matt looked at Emily in time to catch a tiny tear sliding down her cheek, he reached out and brushed it away with the ball of his thumb. When she didn't look up he lifted her chin gently and kissed her. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"I've been in this time for weeks now, and I still feel useless. Abby and Jess have to explain things all the time, Connor is too embarrassed to teach me computers, I'm scared of driving, history is full of depressing people doing stupid things and the repercussions of my time and my people are still causing problems in the world today, and I can't COOK!" She burst out, with something like a sob and a laugh, that mutated into hiccups. "And now (hic) I've got hiccups. I'm a useless anachronism. With hiccups." (hic)

"Emily, you are not (hic) useless. You're not. Jess and Abby love explaining (hic) things, Becker says you're learning (hic) really fast AND you terrified him into riding lessons, Connor is Connor, he'll calm down and not everyone (hic) in history is stupid, Lester just likes reading about people less clever than him so he can be sarcastic about them. (hic) You may be an (hic) anachronism, but so am I. And I know an excellent cure (hic) for hiccups." So saying he look his hiccupping lover's face in both hands and kissed her. They eventually broke for air, the hiccups having been beaten into submission by the rest of the body, which wanted to enjoy this, thank you very much. Matt grinned down at her and said "And as for cooking? Who needs it?" As they tumbled back into each other Emily's last conscious thought was that Love is a truly timeless skill.

**That's all folks! Hope you've enjoyed. You know the drill - Reviews please! Thank you for reading, as always a writer is nothing without their audience. XX**


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